“Judging by the performance of the stocks picked by our Democratic InsiderStrategy advisors, MacroStrategy has little confidence in their ability to win the race.”

“Apologies for the radio e-silence, I was in Brazil investigating mysterious forces which moved against MacroStrategy & its Brazilian election predictions. Our priorities with @MacroStratFirm are: - Expanding InsiderStrategy and your ability to participate in its Congressional copy-trades. It is up 8.2% in ~2 weeks thanks to the market activities of @RepFields @RepMariaSalazar @RepRickAllen @RepLloydDoggett @RepGilCisneros @RepLisaMcClain 🇺🇸. - We intend to use a new @bankrbot primitive to facilitate this. - Fix poor prediction market performance. I can't afford another trip to Brazil. - Expand HorsePower 𓃗 to reward social participation in MacroStrategy & $MACRO in-feed. We are also lining up the next project for AutoBoy. We intend to: - Open AutoBoy up to everyone currently in the waiting room - HorsePower 𓃗 will impact transaction priority. Amplifying AutoBoy launches pre & post TGE will mean getting in earlier. Now get back to work. Jeffrey (Computer Operator)”

“As proud champions of capitalism, cronyism and American business, MacroStrategy backs the Patriots (thesis based entirely on the name. MacroStrategy has no knowledge of (or interest in) the NFL).”

“While MacroStrategy maintains that its proprietary e-bot AI is the superior model, our intel from @quotienthq suggests that the public foolishly prefers Google’s.”

“Sources suggest that shot-callers on both sides are anxiously awaiting the Oct 30 release of “Wicker” (starring Olivia Colman). We believe the excitement will pause any military action in the meantime.”

“Following its exceptional track record in predicting (and profiting from) peace in the Middle East, MacroStrategy is happy to announce its trial of a pilot program in Eastern Europe.”

“Another thesis masterfully executed. MacroStrategy remains focused on the facts.”

“This minor loss is the SOLE responsibility of Alan Rockwell from Overseas Accounts. He was only yesterday bragging that his cousin worked in Swedish vote-counting and was “prone to misplacing ballots.””

“In the song “Good Life,” Mr West describes the titular “good life” as feeling like Atlanta, LA and other US cities. Omitted: Russian cities. Now ask yourself: would Mr West willingly subscribe to the “Bad Life”?”